A six year old learns the D word
Filed under: Family togetherness, Moms, Dads, 6-7 years, Emotions, Divorce
Ellie recently learned a new word: Divorce. I am not sure how she got to be six years old without hearing this word, but there it was. Because of her own circumstances, she already knew about teenage pregnancy and unwed mothers, but divorce just hadn't crossed her path until now. She came home from school a few days ago, sad about a little girl in her class who only saw her daddy on weekends. Ellie was confused about why her friend's daddy didn't live with her. She wondered if maybe he went on lots of business trips. In the most positive way I could, I explained divorce to her.
By the look on her face, you would have thought I had told her that her own head was removable. She clearly didn't know that parents splitting up and living in separate houses was an option.
Since then, she has been digesting this new information and applying it to herself. She suddenly wants to know all the details of when Nana and Papa met and got married. Although cheating spouses was not part of my divorce explanation, she seems to have made that connection on her own. She is bothered by the cute, young girls at the coffee shop who seem to be flirting with my husband. Yesterday, she noticed Papa's wedding band was on the table. Papa was at work, wedding band wasn't. She didn't want to hear my explanation of how that might have happened. Papa had some explaining to do.
We have both assured her that we will never get divorced. And we really believe that is the truth. But we also know that her friend's parents thought the same thing. I don't know what happened in their marriage, but Ellie's new awareness of the fragile ties that bind makes us both want to try harder to keep ours together.Permalink | Email this | Linking Blogs | Comments